Another crummy poem

Floating and falling into this sea of doubt, understanding what the fuck but not knowing what its about, in ecstacy 4 days a week & the other 3 just being plain bleek, always wrong yet always being right, not just accepting my fate without putting up a fight, from where im standing I can see everything crystal clear, yet not understanding the origin of this fear, going and going forward with breakneck speeds, just not being able to get rid of these annoying needs, that are holding me back in ways you won't understand, what the fuck is it from myself I demand? One day ill know what the fuck is the meaning, one day ill get it out without all the screaming, but when is this day I ask of you? and untill then what the fuck else can I do? Afraid of normality in very obscure ways, you will notice it in my out of line displays, always making noise louder than everyone, going through life always pretending to have more fun, always making jokes and laughing the loudest, pissing on and ripping off those that are the proudest. Hiding my habits and scars extremely well, that those who know me can't even tell. What the fuck?? Ill need more than luck...


I got my head but my head is unraveling
cant keep control can't keep track of where it's traveling
I got my heart but my heart's no good
you're the only one that's understood

I come along but I don't know where you're taking me
I shouldn't go but you're wrenching dragging shaking me
turn off the sun pull the stars from the sky
the more I give to you the more I die

and I want you

you are the perfect drug
the perfect drug
the perfect drug
the perfect drug

you make me hard when i'm all soft inside
I see the truth when i'm all stupid-eyed
the arrow goes straight through my heart
without you everything just falls apart

my blood just wants to say hello to you
my fear is warm to get inside of you
my soul is so afraid to realize
how every little bit is left of me

take me with you
without you everything just falls apart
it's not as much fun to pick up the pieces

The perfect drug-NIN