frustration

If only you could comprehend the frustration, the powerlessness, the anger and pain in your every step, the weight you carry, the heightened emotions, the length of the fuse that is connected to this huge overloaded, very tightly compressed heap of bad negative emotions that is blowing up inside you more and more as every day progresses more and more in size and more and more in how dangerous the explosion will be when it will finally be released on some poor asshole that does not expect not to mention does not deserve it. Pain tearing you open with every single step you take, every single empty promise you make, every emotion-happy or sad you fake. Knowing that you have the trust of the masses and yet it hangs by a single thread, having to go against everything you stand for and lie to protect and build on the trust that you have lied so hard to get, not that you don't deserve it but if you told the truth no one would ever believe you-not soon anyway. If it sound confusing to you then imagine how fucking confusing it feels to me to live this lie every single day of my miserable freaking life. Not to know what to expect, every time you hear your name you don't know if you should say-didn't see anything, didn't do anything and I wasn't even there when it happened or just respond by saying yes present, what the fuck am I on about, is it completely senseless or is there a certain depth to this that only some of us would ever be capable to understand-you be the judge, just don't think your opinion will make a difference to my way of thinking...


I'm not like them
But I can pretend
The sun is gone
But I have a light
The day is done
But I'm having fun
I think I'm dumb
Or maybe just happy

Dumb-NIRVANA