How the fuck is it possible to forget about something if you constantly have to remind yourself that you have to forget about it, you really have to find some fucking way to subconciously detach yourself from all this fear and shit? Talk about facing you fears while forgetting about them, dreading the moment they jump up and bite you under the arse again. You really have to rearrange not just your life but your whole mentality and mindset, about this fucking thing thats riding and raping you totally you must forget. Trying to project your thoughts to another place, trying your best to fall casually from grace? I suppose it makes no sense to you, now imagine how i feel and thats what i must try and do. Trying your best to get away from your rapist as far as you can, yet im the raspist; god its getting more and more confusing man? How the fuck do i run away from myself and me? Im my own worst fucking enemy at this moment as you can see. Extremely complicated or am i just complicating it for myself like ive been doing all along? Making everything that has always been right so hectically wrong. Trying to make sense of anything and everything i can, maybe i should start moving forward with some sort of plan? Maybe i should just start moving all this childish shit and people out of my life and move the rest away, maybe then i will start looking forward to my next day...
'How am i gonna keep myself, How am i gonna keep myself away from me?'
Counting Crows - Perfect blue buildings
Opened my eyes this morning and already i had to put up a huge fucking fight, but fighting addiction and the cravings is neither fair nor ri...
Why the fuck cant i just take this one last step into the unknown? I know my path is at its end cause in my dreams to me its been shown? Yet...
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