Complete numbness

Life and death running, bouncing, jumping and tingling and twisting up, down and through my spine, a touch of the beginning and the end taking place at excactly the same freaking time. Not having a clue as to whats the bloody difference between up and down? And the 'normal' people look down upon you as if youre a bloody clown. Confused, happy, angry agressive and pissed off all at the same time; and all this is happening while you have no cash for a fix so you immediately you start contemplating a bit of crime...
Where the fuck is my head at i ask you? To escape this fucking spiral what the hell can i do? Feet firmly cemented into the base of this hole you dug, while your feet is ankered down you still get pushed over and around - WHAT THE FUUUCK! You promised yourself a million times that never again will you touch this shit again, but keeping to that fucking promise is whats driving you completely insane...
Balancing on this thin line between right and wrong, most of the time not knowing which side youre gonna fall on. Complicating every second of your life just more and more, when are they gonna find your lifeless body on the bathroom floor? Sometimes you are really romantacising about dying, but your such a pussy when your heart skips a couple of beats thats when your fear shows and for your life you start crying...

'Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone at home? Come on now I hear you're feeling down. Well I can ease your pain. Get you on your feet again. Relax.'

Pink Floyd - Comfortably Numb