Always a fucking struggle

Will it always be such a fucking struggle to stay clean, every wise ass think they know evrything about you if they just here the gossip about where you've been, always twenty different stories going around, as small and petty as it may sound, it really pulls you down more and more and one if these days with their heads im gonna mop the floor, but then ill be the big bad smackhead again, and then again from scratch all the shit will begin, like this vicious circle there is no escape, constantly these people yor emotions they rape, not caring if there is any thruth in what they say, and all you want is for this shit to go away, normally I don't worry about proving anything to anyone but myself and me, yet all these fuckers are too ignorant told see, all they care about is a good and juicy story to boost their ego and to me that a lot about their mentality does show, but what else is there to do but understand, the thruth you can't force or demand, especially from a narrowminded mentality like the ones they posess and to this every day I bear witness. Some people will just never have a fucking clue and about that there is nothing I can do...