Wednesday, 25 April 2012

Fuuuck!!!

So much anger and fustation for myself i am holding and bearing, with every intense beat of my heart it feels like my veins wanna pop open after an immense tairing, so much i could have done with the fucking money ive been spending on junk, there is absolutely fuckall in this flat but i have money to waste on grass and heroin - stupid fucking punk. Never ever in your whole measly exsistance have you been this dissapointed in yourself before. Cause its alrite if you're the only mouth to feed but nope: theres one more...
When my fucking stupidity and fuckedupness takes a hold of my logic, if you have never experienced heroin addiction before: its fucking toxic! When the part of you that is common sense gets thrown in the corner and you go into your own little world of overdrive, there is not much more in your small little world than your next hit you need and for the one after that to arrive. And the most fucking amazing part is that it not even as if you are enjoying it, all you can think is 'you stupid fucking cunt, let go and just flush the rest of this shit'...
Fat fucking chance of that little thought actually materialising, well actually youve done it before but what good did that bring? Just fucking pissed and annoyed with yourself cause an addict always wants more: So then like a brave man you flush the shit and then you're pissed-off cause once again you have to go and score. This shit really defines you in all sizes and every possible shape and form and its really fucked up that this reality is actually my norm...

'Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again. Because a vision softly creeping. Left its seeds while I was sleeping. And the vision that was planted In my brain still remains. Within the sound of silence'

Simon and Gargunkel - The sound of silence

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