Fucked up

How completely blind and totally fucked up can one person really be? Around me everything is falling apart and getting blown to shit yet im too blind to see. Im trying my utter best to navigate though this self created shit storm whilst flying completely blind; and with vision thats less than zero and a storm that is not at all in any way kind. Waiting to fly straight and headfirst into a rock-face: blood, guts, gore and pieces of shit and organs splattered and spread all over the place...
So competely wasted and screwed up in your head you are, so far gone that you actually have to look down to see the furthest star. Really so over looking for yourself in all different places, seeing the one you love in all different peoples faces. Never ever will you be able to get redeemed of your wrongs and stand a chance of ever going back there, and also what you did to her innocence really was not in any way fair...
Three long years of pretending and lieing, millions of unnecasary tears we both spilt crying, if i could of only been honest from the start, maybe i wouldnt be sitting with this broken fucking heart. Time to let go, time to shine and let it show...

'I still recall the taste of your tears. Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears. My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore. Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore. You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I'm down to just one thing. I'm starting to scare myself'

NIN - Something I can never have