Friday 1 June 2012

Still subjectless

So much shit constantly on your fucking mind, yet to all your worries smack sorta makes you blind, unfortunately its not completely gone; cause you can constantly feel in your gut that theres something wrong. Knawing away at your being and fucking with your sanity, if only 18 years ago you let all this shit be. But there is FUCKALL use to cry over spilt milk today cause it aint gonna make any of your shit go away...
No one who is right in the head would make the same stupid fucking mistake over and again and then a couple of times more, there has to be something wrong with you if it doesnt scare you off every time you turn around at deaths door. In your life how many shrinks have you seen, back to your childhood a million times youve been. Trying to figure why in the name of god you always come running straight to your forbidden love: smack, hating every second of addiction yet with open arms you always welcome her back? Most of the time it feels like you're fighting this huge fucking battle in vain and then one wrong move and all your energy and efforts go down the drain...

'Cuz every time I go to try to leave, something keeps pullin on my sleeve. I dont wanna but I gotta stay these drugs really gotta hold of me. Cuz everytime I try ta tell 'em no they won't let me ever let 'em go. I'm a sucker all I gotta say is drug's really gotta hold of me'

Eminem - Drugs got a hold on me

3 comments:

  1. So true, so fucking true man. Heroin addiction is like fighting with urself, cos u love the
    very stuff thats killing you! Thats the way I see it. I love eminem awesome lyrics hes kinda been there too with the valli's. Hope ur ok neway 'smackhead' whoever / wherever u are

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  2. and its not just love, its really deep and unconditional. ill survive - i hope? ive been for longer than 10 years (and thats just H), i mean ive been addicted for nearly 18yrs(fuuuck!!!! im only 32, eish! im actually a very nice person from capetown

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  3. Hey u started answering comments! Yeah its a love / hate relationship thats hard to beat. u will survive, cos us smackheads r stronger than people give us credit for- we gotta be to live the mad lives we do! ... n Im sure ur a lovely person :-)

    Charlie

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And edited….

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0CP15XQX9/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr= Up in Smoke…a life?